THE LIFE OF ONE OF MY GIRLFRIENDS



Standing on the tracks she looked into the distance. A soft breeze touched her face. Here at this lonely spot, it happened. Here her dear father in a desperate mood had thrown himself in front of the train. Five years after their mother’s death, he had chosen to do it. He was a pastor from a small village, who despite his 5 children, no longer could handle life in his unhappy second marriage.

She sighed and looked around sadly, everything looked so peaceful. After a silent farewell and a prayer she walked back to the house of her girlfriend with whom she was staying for a couple of days. It was years ago that she had lived here in the North. Now as a mother with four grown up children, she was proud and happy that she had come so far. She now had the time to leave the dead in peace and to fill in the last part of her own life. She didn’t want to think about her terrible youth anymore with a stepmother who had ruled over them very harsh, being a deeply disappointed and hateful woman.

As a nurse in training she had fled and had built a new life in the West of Holland. No path of roses, but at least her own path. After several years of hard work, she had married the son of the family with whom she had rented a room. The son sailed on ocean-going tankers and sometimes was 1½ years from home. Every time he was home though, all hell broke loose and she was pregnant again. Then he suddenly decided to stop sailing and work as a port pilot in Rotterdam. Her life and that of her children became a genuine permanent threat then. As good and as bad as it was, she managed to put things straight every time it got out of hand, hoping to keep peace in the house. But when she failed in his eyes wich was consistently, hell broke loose. After 20 years it was enough. She got the house with a life insurance and he kept the rest. Very sad days came and went, she had jobs that were heavy and uncomfortable. Eventually she was declared unfit due to serious physical problems and so she got a little rest. When years later she received a considerable amount of money, paid by her insurance, she could begin her recovery and start to live according to her own views.

She travelled throughout Europe on her own. Everywhere she went she visited museums, also in Holland. She went to Lapland, New Zealand, Vietnam and all Eastern European countries. She lived very frugal, had no car and spent little money on luxury, but she travelled around the globe, broke her leg in England, all on her own.

She now could, looking back on that poor start, enjoy all the happiness she has now, well-developed children, lovely grandchildren and a life filled with many interests. I’ve known her for 52 years, we were living next to each other for some years and were both married with an husband at sea, so very long time alone with little children, we helped each other as much as we could and also had a very nice time those years together, having baby's and taking care of them together, when each of us moved to another place we still kept in touch over all the years and we still do, sometimes much, sometimes less, but we never forget each other. When one of us was in very bad shape we would phone and help each other until now, so our friendship has never ended. Dinkie.



Thursday, February 4, 2010